Hcg test follow up

Went back for follow up check today. My hcg has dropped from the thousands range to 100 today after a week. So doctor reckoned I can do a hp test in 2 weeks time to check if my hcg gone down to below 5. If it's faint line, she suggest to wait a week and do a second test and only to come back If it's still positive. 

She saw something on the scan and couldn't tell definitely if it's blood clot or polyp. She didn't think it will affect pregnacy n so it's ok to leave it. 

Meanwhile my man and I decided to check our chromosome n my immunity which will take place after my period. That means my body will take a break from probes n meds. As the blood needs to be sent to CU ( Chinese uni), it has to drawn in the morn before 12pm and on mon - Thursday only. If the day after is public hols, it's not possible either as they need the blood to b as fresh as possible. 

If fortune telling books is to be believed, the same guy (whom my mum is a fan of) said there is no hope of pregnancy for me this year. The same guy who said I will have no hope either last 2 years and predicted accurately I will be moving home this year. Crap. 

Hcg test follow up

Went back for follow up check today. My hcg has dropped from the thousands range to 100 today after a week. So doctor reckoned I can do a hp test in 2 weeks time to check if my hcg gone down to below 5. If it's faint line, she suggest to wait a week and do a second test and only to come back If it's still positive. 

She saw something on the scan and couldn't tell definitely if it's blood clot or polyp. She didn't think it will affect pregnacy n so it's ok to leave it. 

Meanwhile my man and I decided to check our chromosome n my immunity which will take place after my period. That means my body will take a break from probes n meds. As the blood needs to be sent to CU ( Chinese uni), it has to drawn in the morn before 12pm and on mon - Thursday only. If the day after is public hols, it's not possible either as they need the blood to b as fresh as possible. 

If fortune telling books is to be believed, the same guy (whom my mum is a fan of) said there is no hope of pregnancy for me this year. The same guy who said I will have no hope either last 2 years and predicted accurately I will be moving home this year. Crap. 

5 week 5 day: Miscarriage confirmed after bleeding

After Tuesday blood test, went in again today to test my 2nd Beta. 

As expected, I have miscarried at 5 weeks plus. My hcg on Tuesday was 5000+ but today it has dropped down to 1200+. The scan also revealed most of the blood has gone and some tissues remained. She did a comparison and said it's actually more cleared this time than my last missed miscarriage. 

So she will give me the pills again to try to expel everything rather than wait for the body to do it and be incomplete. We will scan again next week to see if the uterus is cleared completely. 

I asked about test for autoimmunity and chromosome and she said we could wait till 3rd attempt but I was thinking if we should do it now to rule it out first. Dr is ok but recommends till hcg goes to zero so that there will not be a false positive for the tests. 

Lesson to take away from this 2 miscarriage. Even if we start off at high hcg, which is 410 for 8dp3dt for frozen egg, it isn't a warranty that it has a higher chance. My 5 day blast started with half that hcg level but lasted longer with fetal pole seen at 8 week without heartbeat. 

I don't know why I'm having miscarriages repeatedly when I don't feel anything wrong with me and I don't drink or smoke or eat junk. Is 38 yo eggs really that bad??? 

I don't know how many many rounds of Ivf I want to go through. I still have 6 frozen but I don't know how good they are even though they have good grading. This is the moment I really want to rant at the sky n go WTF is wrong?!!!

5 weeks 3 days: follow up checks after blood clot bleeding

Called hospital this morning since I figured they take forever to reply my email. Managed to secure a 1230pm walk in after I explained I was bleeding clots last night. 

Basically, after 2 rounds of blood clots shedding, the bleeding kinda ease up. I went in fully expecting to see nothing.

My doctor before the scan took a quick manual examination at my cervix. She told me she still see something in my uterus like the sac but she cannot confirm because we haven't had our first scan prior. However it is likely that my body is miscarrying. She asked if I had cramps n I said no. Only pinkish discharge.

So I went in for blood test today and another on Friday to see if my HCG is falling. That will be a sure indication of what's happening. 

I'm not hopeful and I told her I m mentally prepared. She said should it be the case, then once again we will have to use the abortion pills process. 

I asked her if there's a need to test but she said no. Normally they only will consider after 3 consecutive miscarriage.

So for now, all I can do is wait n see what happens on Friday. With that much blood loss, even if it's hope against hope, I still like to hope for a miracle. 

5 week 2 day: Started bleeding clots. Natural miscarriage

Just after I blogged about 3weeks + on my home test, I ended up with natural miscarriage tonight. 

First it started with a very "full" feeling like cramp and by 6pm, I felt a gush n didn't think much until I realise it felt too bad. To my horror, I went to toilet and saw my panty liner was soaked thru with bright red blood. 

I went on to cook dinner and my bleeding continued. I knew deep down it's another failed pregnancy. By 8.30pm I went to shower. I decided to stand in tub n my instincts was right. I passed out a huge blood clot with a whitish sac like thing attached to the clot.

 I knew it was over and my body has expelled the unwanted tissue, once again. 

Right now, I'm just bleeding bright red blood without clots. 

I didn't have the heart to tell my poor husband since he is going on a trip tmw. 

Oh well. No one says pregnancy for old woman is gonna be easy. 

5weeks 2 days (21dp3dt)

21dp3dt

Decided to do a clearblue digital pee stick today. Even though I didn't use the first urine of the day as required, it still says 3+ weeks thankfully which coincide with my 5+ weeks counting. This doesn't say much except my hcg is rising but at what rate, unsure. 

Nothing much has changed. Did experienced a shocking night sweat few nights back. I woke up cold and completely drenched in my thin layer of tshirt in an Aircon room. I was so literally wet all over and I just had to crawl out of bed to get changed. 

What did worry me a little was seeing a very slight pinkish discharge for a couple of nights. I wasn't sure if it was irritation from inserting the endometrin suppositories, which I have found it increasingly harder to stick it up my vagina. At the early weeks, it has been relatively been a breeze to slide the applicator up but this week, I really struggled at the entrance. It's like the damn passageway is refusing easy access.

Other than that, sometimes, I felt like something is stuck at back of my throat in the afternoon but it's gone after I sip water. Initially I Thot it might be morning sickness only to realise that it was part of the side effects from overrating cherries, apart from runny tummy. Oh well.

Starting today, tummy been feeling a little cramp like too. It's more like nagging discomfort rather than actual pain. 

It's 13th jan today. Another 8 days to go before I know the outcome from the u/scan. No point being worried I guess since there's absolutely nothing I can do to change anything. I'm glad I'm moving, so that I have something else concrete to distract me and look forward to, something within my control. 

4weeks 4 days (16dp3dt): Ramblings

4weeks 4 days (16dp3dt)

Time seems to fly past when I'm not hung up on dates.
Today, I dropped by my TCM to pick up some herbs which is targeted at potential mothers with miscarriage history. Hopefully this will help.

I still feel normal and the same.
I did a pee test yesterday and ok, it says 2-3 weeks now. Hope that means my little bud is growing, alive and kicking inside, figuratively speaking of course.

Compared to the last round, despite the mild cough and sniffling, I feel better in the sense that I dont feel as cold as previously. Also, my weight remains at 52kg. No funny business of dropping down to 49kg like the previous round.

Been eating alot of cherries, so that definitely helped with my bowel business and prevent constipation due to progesterone. Then again, constipation will prob be a more serious problems for mothers with a bigger tummy I think.

In terms of food, maybe its still early but unlike previous round, I dont have much cravings either.
Just the usual food to get back.

The only thing I am waiting to see if it happens is morning sickness.
Of course not everyone who suffers from it will have a live birth but somehow it seems to prove to be a stronger indication. We shall see....

Apart from baby business....I have tons of work mapped out before me!

Been a busy week, finalising the paper work for our new rental place and trying to contact various movers for appointments to get free quotes for the local HK move.

Narrowed down to
- Expert movers (waiting for someone to call me back to fix a date)
- Links Relocation (waiting for someone to call me back to fix a date))
- Santa Fe
- Tradeswind
- Yamato

Definitely ruled out Crown after the disastrous experience I had with my international move with them from Sydney to Hong Kong. Crown Australia is SHITTY and EXPENSIVE and INCOMPETENT. They damaged so many of my furnitures and they couldnt even finish packing in Sydney and I had to chip in to help pack. So no, NO MORE CROWN thank you very much. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one with shitty service from them....was trolling the forums and other expats had the same problems with them.

I thought about trying local movers but the thought of them possibly ruining my plasma and other ex furniture made me pause.

Meanwhile, my HK landlord seemed like a really nice chap. I guess being born rich affords to be nice to tenants unlike our previous cheap nasty wannabe rich HK landlord. This new landlord is only 34yo, holds a high position and graduates from Harvard. Very nice chap who had his staff to meet me to discuss about my needs for blackout curtains etc. His only request in contract is no smoking in the premises which is totally fine by me, since personally i HATE smokers and since I was 10yo, I banned all my relatives form smoking inside our house. Yes...I was a terror back then. Good thing all my uncles doted on me and were happy to hole up in the balcony to lit up.

Meanwhile,  informed my part time helper about my move and if she is willing to continue to follow me to my new place. She was more than happy to continue working for us. I joked with her "Thank goodness....at least that means I'm not a bad employer!" Lol! I reckon she prob like my new place better being closer to Central. That means she spend less on transport getting to my place coz she can walk down the escalator.
Everyone's happy!